Leavenworth: Is this Winter Wonderland worth the hype?

 Alright Alright Alright!!!

It's been a while since I returned back to my blog. Although it doesn't mean that I wasn't writing. I have poured my thoughts into pages upon pages of a ten-year old diary, with an extremely fluid fountain pen. The joy of a pen running smoothly over high GSM paper is something else. A computational fluid dynamics engineer would say that the flow of the ink from the cartridge to the paper was laminar. That's the kind of obsession that has kept me away from typing my thoughts in.

So what brought me here today? A memory from a time that had genuinely scared me. 

In my life, I have been through some really tense situations without getting flustered. Those tales are long and each one deserves a blog. This one happened in a remote Bavarian village in the state of Washington, US. The place is Leavenworth, a Christmas holiday destination, known as an idyllic town, nestled among snow-capped mountains. A beautiful winter wonderland. 

My wife and I had been checking out this Bavaria-themed village since quite some time. On Youtube, we would watch the live feed of a street view camera which overlooked a town square, decorated with trees draped in LED lights. The village resembled a Bavarian village surrounded by snow covered peaks. I wondered how such a place came into existence in such a remote corner. Luckily, we got a chance to explore this village on our own. In our recent visit to Seattle, we were meeting our cousins in Bellevue, Washington. We finally had an opportunity to visit this village.

We left for Leavenworth from Bellevue in the morning. It was a grey morning, with a drizzle, every now and then. As the weather report read, the mountain didn't come out that day, which is a colloquial way of describing the weather in Seattle. If Mount Rainier is visible, then you may expect a bright day ahead. It looks like this picture below, from my cousin's apartment, which is a pretty sick view to have.

So yeah, we didn't get the mountain's blessing the day we left for Leavenworth. Nevertheless, we moved on with our plan. My wife and I had a bus from Bellevue to Seattle, from which a bus would take us to Leavenworth. Before getting on with the journey, we helped ourselves to a nice coffee, a soft blueberry muffin, and a cupcake from a local confectionery. A quick bus ride from Bellevue to Seattle, and we reached our boarding point. The Seahawks were playing the Patriots, in the Superbowl, in a few days time, so Seattle was pretty decked up for the game. I had just returned from Boston a few days ago, so my allegiance lay with the Patriots. In all honesty, I have never watched nor do I follow American Football. 

The bus was delayed, so we passed our time going through pamphlets of other cities and townst o visit in Washington. Apart from Leavenworth, we loved Portland, Oregon's vibe. Although American marketing is on another level, so be careful of what you are getting sold on. The bus stop was having a really dull morning that day, but neither the weather, nor the ambience could dampen our spirits. There was a lady struggling to get the right tickets for her travel. We were busy planning the day at Leavenworth, while also trying to keep an eye out for our boarding call.  As soon as the bus came, we took our place by the windows. A quick attendance, and we were on our way. The bus took an hour to get out of Seattle. We were glued to the window screen, alert, not to miss anything extraordinary. Though the architecture in US rarely stands out. Despite us peering out to catch anything exciting, we could only appreciate the uniformity and standardization of American establishments. Having travelled to some of the corners of the US, we weren't surprised. It was a good time to catch some sleep.

As soon as we got out of the city, we were hit with the views we were waiting to catch. Washington and its beautiful natural beauty popped up. Leavenworth is nestled in the Cascades mountain range. So we came prepared to gaze at the beauty of its snow-covered peaks. The drizzle gave way to snow as the bus rumbled through the interstate. The snowflakes occasionally landed on our screens before melting into a drop. One turn after another, we snaked around hills and valleys for the next couple of hours. Finally, we climbed down a little valley where our destination lay. The last leg of the journey was us mostly thinking about food. We had finished our cakes and were getting sharp hunger pangs.

The bus reached a deserted parking lot. We got down, looked around. There was no snow anywhere. Where was the winter wonderland we came searching for? Surely, we will find some spots as we move into the village, we told ourselves. I swung my backpack and we started walking towards a huge concrete building. It must be a place to get some refreshments for the rest of the trip, we thought. As soon as we walked in, we were back in the US. The thing about American standardization is that you will find the same convenience inside a store, no matter which corner of the country you are in. We quickly grabbed a couple of bites and got out to explore the village. The village is entirely walkable, which is what we love to do when on a trip. With a physical map in hand, I lead the way into the town. About half a km later, we finally start noticing the cute village springing into life. There is some music playing from the other end of the road. The beautiful buildings built for tourists to experience a Bavarian villager's life are decorated with Christmas lights. The trees are draped in LED lights in various colours. The snow has been neatly shovelled off walk-ways and I could see very few tourists around. Suddenly, we realize that we are standing at the same spot in front of the camera, which gets streamed live on Youtube twenty-four by seven. So many people around the world would be watching us now. We looked into the public camera and wave at it. It goes without saying that no experience can be adequately captured in a camera every. This is what an AI will never get. The ability to be truly present in the moment, soaking everything in. The cascades with with snow covered peaks are looking down upon you, as though they are watching us in a little show of their own making. We wasted no time and got to explore the town.

There was the nutcracker museum, various bakeries, many cute souvenir shops, many pubs, cafes and eateries, and what not. We couldn't hold out on food any longer, so we went to have lunch in a beautiful restaurant on the main road, called Gustav's bar. Inside, the restaurant was done in thick oakwood, almost entirely.

I helped myself to a nice draught beer, because I was in faux Bavaria. We loaded up on a delicious burger, a sandwich and fries. After a sumtuous meal, we spent the afternoon exploring the village, completing our checklist of things to do, or food to eat. It was a lovely afternoon. Whenever we got tired, we found an empty bench to soak in everything the place had to offer. Leavenworth is notorious for being overcrowded with tourists, especially in the winter. Thankfully, our timing was impeccable. It was as if the entire village had put up a show only for us.                                                                                            

The display outside the nutcracker museum.

 I tried to take better pictures. Unfortunately, my skills as a photographer are limited. Rather, I felt guilty whenever I took my hands out for a picture. The place is so beautiful that you wouldn't want to waste even a second trying to capture it. Some things are meant to be experienced in-person. We were loving every moment. It was cold, yet cosy. We were strolling, hand in hand, feasting our eyes on anything that looked cute, and more importantly, overwhelmed with gratitude for this experience. It was like our honeymoon all over again. A couple of hours of enjoying a hot beverage, crepes, local snacks and some souvenir shopping, we heard a loud bell followed by some chimes. The music, which we had heard when we got to town at the start of the day, was playing out nearby. It was that of an Accordian (a wind instrument with keys), but instead of an actual player, it was an extremely elaborate cuckoo clock, with figurines dancing to the music. Some of the tourists gathered around this clock along with us. An extremely ornate clockwork performance featuring reindeers, dancers, dwarves, and several other miniatures lasted about 5 minutes. Before we could get enough of it, these little mechanical miniatures returned back to the cuckoo clock. 

Where is the scary part in all of this? 

The cuckoo clock reminded us that we should be preparing to leave. The lights had come on, and our ride back to Bellevue was from a location few kms away from where we were. We still had time though. We said our goodbyes to each of the little shops we went into. Once we made peace with saying goodbye, I opened Uber, tapped for a preferred cab, and waited. In the meantime we recounted our experience to each other. A few mins elapsed, but we didn't get any confirmations. I changed my preferences and tapped the book button. The mountains were getting cloaked by the clouds. A slight drizzle had started. I checked my phone again. No confirmation yet. I made my preference even more generic. This time, I stayed on the app screen. The loading bar was slowly progressing across the screen. In another min, it had completed the scan yet no Uber drivers seemed nearby. I start to worry.

About 30 mins have gone past, but not a single ride has been confirmed. Both of us are on multiple apps. My calm demeanor had turned into a frantic wait. I was starting to get worried, although, I tried hard not to show it on my face. My wife was still assured. But as more time elapsed, I was beginning to panic. Unlike any of my previous experience I didn't have a guaranteed plan B. We had to return to Bellevue that night, because our flight out of Seattle was the next morning. From Seattle, we had a flight back to San Jose, following which, we had a flight out of San Francisco to Bangalore via Heathrow. We were literally going to travel half-way around the world and each leg was planned back-to-back. I should have accounted for any unforeseen circumstance, I told myself. But right then, I couldn't miss my ride back to Bellevue, surely. 

While I was panicking, my wife remained cool as a cucumber. Somehow she was quite composed, to the extent that she was unbothered. I invoked my cousins' help to see if they could book a ride on our behalf, but even they couldn't. Almost an hour had passed. We barely had 30 mins left to reach the pickup spot. I calmed myself down and started a google search for any local cab providers in Leavenworth. Three or four options later, I finally connected with a person, a real human and not an automated voice. In no time, I explained the urgency of my request. He patiently heard me through and promised that he will be there to pick us up in 10 mins, in his pick-up truck. With almost no time left, we had no option but to pray dearly that this guy, in the middle of a small village, would show up in his pick-up truck and drop us. Every second passed slowly. Can we make it?

The lights had turned on everywhere now. We had our credit cards, so finding a decent place to stay was not an issue. But to make it in time for all subsequent travel, felt like threading a needle from a yard away. About twelve minutes had already passed. No sign of the cab driver yet. I called him for the seventh time. Click. 

"Hello, Partha. Where are you?"

"We are right next to the crosswalk, under the traffic lights. Look towards the Leavenworth town sign"

"Got you. Wait right there"

He turned his car right around, and in doing so, must have broken at least a couple of traffic laws. As soon as he pulled up, we jumped to the back seat and asked him to race away. I started to call the shuttle service to check their ETA. The customer service agent had answered but he couldn't be sure of the ETA of the shuttle that was meant to pick us up. We completed the payment before we even got down. Another ten minutes later, we were at our pick up spot but we were five minutes past our designated pick-up time. Did we miss the shuttle? The pick-up truck cab driver wished us luck and sped away.

When we looked around we were in the middle of nowhere. Not a single soul around. It was an empty parking lot with a couple of parked vans. The parking lot was next to a highway crossing. It was already dark now. Apart from a few lamp posts in the parking lot, we could only see a church at some distance. It was a beige building built like a Georgian cathedral, with conical mounts over cylindrical structures, giving medieval vibes. Yet, there was no sign of any shuttles or vehicles coming our way. In the US, people are on schedule, to the minute. What if we had missed our ride? At least Leavenworth had some decent options to stay. This no man's land has nothing around. Even the church looked quite spooky, to say the least. We were better off in Leavenworth in that case. I made sure I saved the pick-up truck cab driver's number, in case we had to call him back.

The night had truly settled in. I was glad to have my wife's company but at the same time I felt responsible for our safety. It was almost 20 minutes past our pick-up time. The operator of the shuttle service had not yet confirmed the exact location of the shuttle when we called her. We waited under a lamp post. From afar, a car pulled up into the parking lot. It surely wasn't a shuttle service. When it rolled in, a window rolled down and I could see a muzzle. It was a guy with his pet dog. I trust people with pets. After a moment of hesitation, I went up to their car.

"Hello. We are waiting for a shuttle back to Bellevue. You wouldn't be the service provider by any chance, right?"

"Hi, you are right. I am here to walk my dog. Are you guys waiting for a shuttle service"

"Yes, we are. I am not sure we are waiting at the right place though."

I read out the location to him, which he confirmed was correct.

"I guessed we missed our ride back home"

"Ohh that's bad. Where do you have to go back?"

"Bellevue"

"Okay. That's quite far from here. I hope the shuttle shows up still. Otherwise, you should probably head back to Leavenworth"

My heart sank. I picked up my phone to call the cab driver back. But instead, my phone rang.

"Hello, Partha?"

"Yes, yes, please tell me."

"I am so sorry to keep you waiting. But I have good news. The shuttle got delayed on the way. I spoke to the driver. He should be pulling in to pick you up any moment now"

"Oh thank you, thank you, thank you so much. I couldn't tell you how relieved I am." It felt like I was Sandra Bullock from Gravity, where she finally tunes in to an amateur radio station from the decommissioned Tiangong Space Shuttle. In the movie the amateur radio operator had a dog too.

"I am glad." the customer service person's voice cracked. "It is quite unusual that our services get delayed by even a couple of mins. Looks like you are in luck."

My face showed, that an immense weight had been lifted off me. I looked at the curch far away, and thanked God for keeping us on track with our schedule. In a few minutes, a headlight turned towards us. I had never been so happy to see someone come for us. The shuttle rolled in in style. The shuttle driver apologized for the wait, confirmed our names, and opened the huge sliding door. First, my wife got in, followed by me. We found individual seats one behind the other. All the other seats were taken already. The door closed, and we rolled out of the parking lot, almost immediately.

Even though I was relieved, I was not entirely at ease. The shuttle was warmer inside and it was pitch dark. Immediately after we left the parking lot, the snow came. Through the tinted screen we could see that the cascades had kicked up quite a storm. The trees were pitch black, with only the snow reflecting off the moon light. The cars racing down the interstate showed a glimpse of how bad the weather was. I was all alert. In a shuttle with five other strangers, for a journey that would take at least 3 hours, I was in no mood to let my guard down. My wife took a small nap, and I cajoled her into it. The shuttle raced through the darkness. I kept on checking the maps to track the progress. On the window, I could only see the snow swirling swiftly with the wind whenever a car crossed us from the opposite side. I didn't even blink once. After an hour and a half later the speed of the shuttle reduced. I could see a semblance of a town from the window, before it finally pulled up into the parking of a refuelling station. My wife's got up when the huge doors slid open.

"Alright folks, we have stopped for a break for 10 mins, not a minute more. Do not be late. There will be no waiting."

We got out, stretched our legs, and walked into the convenience store. Both of us were hungry now. After a quick bathroom break and a quick snack run at the store, we made it back to the shuttle. The last leg was not terrifying anymore.

A couple of hours later, we were in Bellevue. We made it. My cousin brother was at the bus stop to pick us up. The Leavenworth trip was finally over. Was it worth the drama? I guess so. My wife says that a little bit of drama does make a trip all the more memorable. I couldn't agree with her more. 

                 

Why is Sonam Wangchuk fasting?

Between my day job and nightly pursuit of my passions, who am I? I asked this question to myself insincerely, with no real intention of chasing an answer. I am a guy who has more or less made peace with life. Life's definition for me is to be alive, to experience and etch moments in time. It could be as crazy as a trip or an experience, or as simple as catching the sunset, or having a laugh with someone you love. Life doesn't have to be difficult if you know what you need to keep you happy.

Ask any materialists, my answer will be beyond their comprehension. Who can blame them, or rather anyone. As the saying goes 'whatever floats your boat'. Pursue whatever you choose to, but do it with the right intent. You may ask me, what if you have a passion to do harm, or to exploit others, where do you draw the line. It's quite simple. Your pursuit should not come at the cost of causing harm to others, or impeding their rights. You may counter, "What if I am preparing for an entrance exam, I am bound to fight for my seat, taking over someone else's seat. Won't that mean I cause someone hurt, or harm?" My answer to that is that it won't. The system gave everyone a fair chance, a platform to prove yourself. You did what is right by you. So the harm isn't perpetuated by you towards any individual. It isn't intentional. It's rather the difference in your circumstances. To bring people from different circumstances to a level playing field, a system of reservation was created. It's the job of government, the system, to uphold the spirit of fairness, and for its people to hold it (government) accountable for its failure to do so. The judiciary exists to impose these checks and balances. Has the government or the judiciary done its job well? You should have an opinion, but more on this in the future. 

Rights. Impeding the rights of others. What do we mean by rights?

You may go back to your Civics subject from your childhood curriculum. One of the most boring subjects. One which entailed questions like rights, constitution, definition of freedom etc. What seemed like the very definition of boredom, somehow, has the most important texts and passages of our life. It is by these words that we live our daily life. This system, laid down by the people, for the people, and to be upheld by the representatives of people, gives everyone the platform to thrive in life. The pursuit of happiness begins only on the firm foundations of our constitutional rights and freedom of life. If you don't have this fair system, the only rule of law would be of money, power, and survival.

Thrive vs Survive. Which one to choose?

Survival of the fittest is a rational given by materialists, who justify their endless pursuit of money, power, materials, as their one and true right. It made sense in a world where usable resources were scarce. Back in the day, when humans were hunters and gatherers, our instincts were the difference between survival and death. However, ten thousand years ago, we discovered agriculture. With agriculture, our temporal horizon increased from surviving the day, to surviving the year, to surviving the lifetime, and now to leave a legacy. This expansion of our time horizon led us to build all these systems. From tribes, to clans, to villages, to cities, to civilizations, the need for an order and merit-based system was always the ultimate goal. Sure, human beings fell along the way, made terrible mistakes, yet they still wanted to build a society that would move on from surviving to thriving.

What's the key difference between surviving and thriving, you may ask.

You survive when you live in a world of scarcity. You thrive when you are living in a world of abundance. The difference is knowing what you really want from your life. If you know you want to make music, you would derive all the joy from life making your kind of music. If you know you love designing games, you will want to spend all your time in creating something that you love truly. Nothing else will matter, or should matter. You can feed your passion with time and practice, everything else is background noise. With the improvement in medicine, with the development of technology, with the progress towards superintelligence, we hope to build a world of abundance. 

So why are we failing spectacularly to recognize something so simple?

Because we don't spend the time needed to ask who we are. Which is what brings me to the first question I asked of myself. Who am I between my day job and nightly pursuit of my passions. Just a normal human being, I guess.

So why is Sonam Wangchuk fasting?

Because the system built to protect the people has failed. Because the representatives chosen to uphold the spirit of fairness have made the system unfair.

Remembering Cleve Moler... the man behind MATLAB

It was past bedtime. My wife and I had barely finished our conversation when the rain finally came. It wasn't the first shower of the summer. More like the fifth shower, over the last two really hot months, in Bangalore. But for the first time this summer, the rain had finally turned benevolent. Not raging or tumultuous, not sparse or farcical, but just the right amount of rain, the city needed. We both sat up, drew the curtains open, and paused to look outside. The haze from the rain made a halo around the streetlights of our apartment, around the tower demarcation lights, and over the oddly hoisted, glowing from within the dial, clock, above the swimming pool. The mist from the rain was sprayed into our bedroom by the wind. The city, and certainly, all the people in it, would have thanked God for this blessing from the skies.

In a state of mindless polling, I opened my Outlook, anticipating an e-mail from a customer. Instead, I found an email from our CEO, Jack Little, with nothing but Cleve Moler's name in the subject line. The moment I saw the subject, I feared the worst news. I took a deep breath and opened it. To my dismay, it was an announcement of Cleve's passing away. May his soul rest in peace.

It's been eight years since I joined MathWorks, the company behind MATLAB. For those people who haven't had anything to do with STEM, this software would have still touched your life in ways you can't imagine. If you have ever driven a car, or taken a cab, if you have ever taken a flight, or used a PC or a smartphone, if you have used a home appliance, or undergone a medical scan, if you have ever traded in the financial market, or been among the very few who have travelled into space, you would have used a tool that was designed using MATLAB. 

Cleve Moler built the first version of this software.

And since the last 42+ years, the world has benefitted from his work in innumerable ways.

I am writing this small post for Cleve, as a tribute to this lovely, brilliant, kind and simple gentleman. I am not claiming to have known him in person. There would be thousands of people who would know Cleve much better than I do. My memory of him is from a very simple incident, but not very long ago.

We were at our Annual Sales Kick-Off event a couple of years ago. It was the first day of the event. As is standard, Jack was delivering the Quarterly update of MathWorks' performance. I had taken a front row seat. No, I wasn't getting an award, nor was I gonna be up on the stage to deliver a talk. It just happened that the front row seats were vacant. Besides, the event organizers are always happy if the front row seats are occupied. Somewhere in between Jack's talk, I noticed that Cleve had also settled in, right behind me. Since I was seated at the very end of one of the columns in the middle, Cleve, in his motorized wheelchair, was seated in the alleyway right behind me. I looked back and smiled at him. I felt nothing but immense gratitude for the man who built MATLAB. Thanks to him, we were all there. Right when Jack's talk got over, the audience got up to leave the hall for a break. I too was about to get up, when I felt a very light nudge on my chair. I turned around and saw it was Cleve's wheelchair. He had realized that his electric wheelchair had slightly gotten out of his control. He feared that he would have knocked me hard. It was barely anything at all. Despite assuring him right away that it was nothing, he got profusely apologetic. He looked at me, and he kept saying sorry. In my gratitude and admiration for him, I kept telling him that it was all right. He didn't have to apologize and  I barely felt a thing. Yet, Cleve seemed inconsolable. He seemed to have lost some confidence in operating his wheelchair because of that miscontrol. His hands trembled when he tried to steer his wheelchair away. That very moment, Cleve's caregiver took control and lovingly yet carefully steered Cleve away. Even on his way out of the hall, Cleve had that innocent, apologetic look, as if something grave and untoward had happened. I hope my assurances eventually had an effect.

I will always remember that short encounter with Cleve. He had a brilliant mind, without a doubt, but he was a simple, kind and sensitive person. I cannot imagine doing anything to even one-tenth of what he did, or having an impact like he had with his work. But I hope I will always remember to be kind and sensitive to others around me, like how Cleve was with me the other day. Today, Cleve is no more with us in person, but he will be remembered through all of us at the MathWorks, and indirectly, by more than hundred-thousand customers and by more than five million users of MATLAB who have accelerated the pace of Engineering and Science, over the last 42 years. 

As Jack put it in his email, Cleve has been a force of great goodness in the world, and we will miss him.

What's up!!!

This is not going to be blogpost reminiscing all that you missed, but rather a mere contemplation of how life in general has evolved from over seven years ago. By now, I have survived, a second re-election of the ruling party, a pandemic that cornered everyone to their homes, literally, a few foreign trips, an advancement in AI that is rendering people jobless, a third-but-cautious re-election of the ruling party, and finally, after much struggles and challenges, a lovely person to come home to. Life has been good to me in the last seven years, which my fellow readers (if any) have missed.

As I sit before my laptop, trying to wade and comb through any significant thoughts, I must also tell you that in the last 8 years, Liverpool FC have won the Champions League once and the Premier League twice. It is incredible to be a Liverpool fan at this point of time. As I write this blog, my thoughts are also drawn to the beautiful parade that LFC players undertook, and the terrible incident caused by a driver who rammed into 60+ supporters in his car. It was horrific that the parade, which was meant for a celebration ending in a horrible way.

I have a beautiful home now. From my balcony I can see deep into the Bangalore skyline. Here's a picture of it.

Those little lights near the horizon is the Bengaluru skyline, which has remained my home for over 13 years now. <May the fourth 2026> Resuming this blog post after a year, I have to add that Liverpool FC have lost a beloved player in Diogo Jota, to a brutal road accident, and the last year has been a tough year for us. Yeah, Mo Salah leaving Liverpool is truly the end of an Era at Liverpool, an era, every Liverpool fan is so proud of>

Such a long time in a single city, that I have not contemplated moving to any other. After all., all the major tech advancements in India happen in this hub. That and of course, the Bengaluru weather to thank God for this comfortable life. Funnily enough, I came across an Instagram post with a picture of Warren Buffet, and a quote, that surely didn't come from him, about how you should be grateful in life despite any uncertainties that tumble your way. I came across something similar from a character called Stratt in the book, Project Hail Mary, who before seeing off her favorite person, Dr. Ryland Grace, had cited the brutal nature of humanity and its struggle for food. 

What else is up?

I have been reading a lot of books. It's really me going back to the phase of my life where I am rekindled my love for good literature. After the phase in the early to mid 2010s, and of course while I was in school. Just over the last couple of weeks, I have finished reading two books; Project Hail Mary, and Days at the Morisaki Bookshop.

Days at the Morisaki Bookshop, is the story of a young girl in Japan, Takako, who started experiencing her adult life. The book starts with a scene of Takako, getting dumped by her boyfriend who she knew from work. Unable to move on she quits her job and just refuses to step out into the world. Concerned by her reluctance to move on from reclusion, her mom makes her decide between one of the two options: arranged marriage or moving on to help her Uncle Satoru's at their used bookstore. Her uncle, is delighted to have 'Takako' help him with managing their used book store focused on modern writers of Japan. While Takako, realizes that without a job, it will be difficult to continue at her current arrangement, she decides, albeit reluctantly, that she will accept her uncle's offer, in exchange for boarding and salary. Not many things change at first, but the human mind is also funny. Even if it has seen some serious trauma, it does get bored of. Boredom gets Takako up on her feet. Slowly and steadily, she develops a taste for literature, steps out to explore a new suburb, and makes new friends. The book reads as Takako's own narration of this period of her life.

If you want to know about Project Hail Mary, there is a nice movie that came out, which people have enjoyed at the Imax theatre. I haven't watched the movie because I wanted to read the book. I'll leave that story for you to discover.

Among the other books I finished, there was a re-read of 1984 by George Orwell, and a book titled Dove, based upon the life of a teenage sailor, who takes his boat, called Dove, around the world over a period of five years. He starts off from California, heading on to Hawaii, to New Zealand, Australia, Madagascar, South Africa, the Caribbean islands, and finally back to California. 

Is that all?

Nope. I have now journaled my thoughts continuously for more than a year and half now. The intention is to have a log of my undiluted thoughts, available to me and family, as a memoir. Why did I prefer a journal over a blog? It's my love for calligraphy with a fountain pen and a plain old blank pages of a diary, where my thoughts could descend without any justification or judgement.

As Miranda Priestly put it,"That's all". For now, at least.

Make One Difference

I was standing at a sweet shop, Chatpatalal snacks and sweets in Whitefield. It was a Saturday noon. I was meeting a friend after 7 years. Since the time we last met I had completed my Bachelors in Engineering, and have already worked in 3 different companies. In the same time he has become a doctor, served under the Hippocratic oath and is currently continuing his post graduation. The two hour window between his travel was the only chance to catch up a little with my old friend. There I was, standing at a sweet shop, waiting for my friend to collect his box of sweets. This is about those five minutes of thought work.

The roads kept busy, the dust never settled, and I was fed up of too many first world problems. There was a tea shop with the 40-ish looking vendor, eagerly scanning the people for some business. I wonder what story he must be having, what keeps him going. There were some couples on the road too. Some looked too bored of each other, and the love they wore resembled your old favorite shirt, washed, rinsed and tumbled over a million times. People kept moving in and out of the shop, some with their family, some with friends. A dad and a son caught my attention.

The son was young, around 5-6 years old. He was like any other kid of that age, wearing bright colors all over, touching, looking, dreaming, play acting and in a world that only he knew. I am sure, he would have his own superheroes who with all their superpowers teach kids some very basic lessons of life. His dad was waiting for his box of sweets too. The kid looked at anything fancy, asking his dad so many questions, adding and updating his real-time wish list. Sometimes he would stick against the glass wall watching away, and sometimes he would loose a sneaker while running around. The dad, let him wander a little, and yet kept a close watch to ensure the kid doesn't hurt himself. For the kid the Dad had changed his old life of careless wanderings to a nurturing loving family man. The world that he provides the kid, the way he manages the kid's wish and will, the things that he teaches from the real world, will be the valuable lessons the kid will remember throughout his life.

I had been a kid, and I could relate to these beautiful moments. No wonder how big I grow or how old I get, I'll always have my dad nudging me in the path when I go too wary. I was lucky, unlike 176 million children in India, who need urgent care.

That afternoon was going to be my first class of my second year at Make a Difference. I had four new kids to teach, guide, nudge and make a difference too. These kids are unlike me, you or anyone who have had a controlled stimulating world while growing up. These kids have faced the hard truths of life at such a tender age. Many are orphans, with no one to guide them, many disabled with no one to even bat a flashing eye, forget a smile, as if they didn't even exist. I was going to meet them, spend time with them every week, until the end of the session. I realized, I had to give these kids the inspiration, the belief, that they too belong and are equally a part of the world like us. They too deserve the choices we had while growing up, and that they can become anyone they wished too. But then I get worried, whether I can change any of their situation, by spending only 2-3 hours a week with four 11 year-old kids trying to make a difference.

In the five minutes of deep observation at a sweet shop on a Saturday noon, the realization came uninvited, that the task at hand was stupendous. I am scared since I know this challenge is too big and overwhelming to overcome by one person or one organisation alone. Yet I would still try I would try to make a difference every time that I knew.

Later that afternoon I met my four kids, Shanmukha, Gautam, Shashank and Ashok. I am supposed to teach English, as the current shelter needs vernacular teachers for Maths and Science. Shanmukha loves drawing, understands and speaks English well, and shows incredible amount of maturity. He is my go to person when I have to make sure the other three kids follow. I consider myself wise, but I had half his wisdom when I was his age.

Gautam, Shashank and Ashok, are yet to make the first few English sentences all by themselves. These are the new kids to join the shelter. Gautam loves running, Ashok loves Kabaddi, and Shashank wants to run more sprint relays. All of them want to join the military when they want to grow up.

So I taught them one little insignificant thing from our lives. I taught them how to introduce themselves when they meet someone new in English. As per my introduction, I am Partha, an Ed Support Volunteer at Make a Difference, and I want to make one difference everyday.

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The day out at Golden Palms retreat

Golden Palms Resort and Spa is about 57 kms from my office in Bangalore. It has a beautiful swimming pool shaped like the number eight. It has a spa to spa yourself out of all the miseries. It has cricket, football, tennis, cycling, rolling, anything that you can imagine under the skies. And a lot of attractive people are always around. I was there too, standing on the spring board of the swimming pool, looking down into the beautiful crystal clear water. The sun was hot and the pool was cool. A straight dive to the bottom would be heavenly, letting the gushing water take away all my stress. The most amazing thing ever.

Every time there is a trip being planned the chances of that happening is less than 10% (there is no validation of the statistic used). The discussions that sprout up during the lunch time are a minor escape from the reality of a sales job, brewing the plan of a weekend at a resort. The chances of it happening, reduces exponentially with each passing day. I was among the more optimistic and hopeful ones. So I was already imagining the dive into the pool. In fact, “obsessing” would be a better word here.

Thursday lunch (13:30 pm): “Guys let’s getaway one weekend, to a resort or spa and chill out”.

“Yay”! “Hurrah”! “I have been here” “I have been there”.  Because the word “soon” would kill it, a date was fixed. The next Saturday of the extended weekend was chosen as the day when we would get away.

Where? To one of the four places shortlisted. It was done quickly and a mail was sent to everyone.

My manager was not included in the plan. I had been wondering if it would be the right thing to keep him out of the loop. He had never been a jerk to me, and many believe that the transformation happened after he had his baby boy.  Thus the hypothesis,”The best way a human can contribute to the future was to pass on the evolutionary information of survival in their DNAs, by having a baby with a perfect mate. The verbal knowledge we share with the world is just a minor fraction of that we have in our DNAs. Babies are indeed a couples’ gift to the world…”

Nevermind!

The enthusiasm in the group was seeping now, but I managed to keep myself excited.

How would I gear up? A shoulder bag with the towels and spares, swimming boxers, the power-bank-cum-bluetooth speaker,  wearing three-fourths, t-shirt and canvas to go with a wayfare.

What would I do on the way to the resort? Chat a bit, charm a bit more, settle down on one of the corner window seats, put on some music and stare away at anything that was aesthetic.

What would I do when I get there? A bit of snooker and table tennis to warm up, followed by squash and volleyball, and spend the rest of the day lying in the pool.

It wasn’t supposed to be. All the nice expectations I had built up was fizzing out when two of my colleagues dropped out of the plan. There were still enough people to make it happen in my opinion but the enthusiasm was now draining out into the gutter. I was getting desperate to dive into the pool now. I wondered if I could just apparate the entire team with me to the Golden Palms Resort, right then and there. But that would be a straight forward breach of my mortal impersonation. They weren’t supposed to know that I was a Genie. I had used my powers once when I did a trick for a colleague on her birthday, but it wasn’t obvious. There had to be a mortal way.

I called up the resort in to ensure the availability, in a hope, that action rather than words would get their lazy asses back on.

The resort was available. All I had to say was a “Yes” to the adoringly sweet voice of the receptionist.

 I rushed into the TSC bay, ready to inspire my team with a speech. So I began “I have a dream…”

“What other hypotheses do you have?”

I looked back to see my manager, still poking a little joke on the baby hypothesis. That was it. The moment was gone. He wasn’t supposed to know about the trip. I gulped the speech right away, and went into a limbo, where I finally dived into the pool, waiting to splash into the beautiful-crystal-clear water, only to realize halfway down, that the pool was crystal clear because there was no water in it. My little mid-day fantasy was about to crash and burn.

“Pardon me?”

“What other hypotheses do you have?”

“If you ever plan a trip after having a heavy Thursday lunch, first book and then dream of it.”

The Luxury of Dreams

I am 25 now and I am supposed to be dead fucking serious about my long term dreams. The best way to start is doing something right away. Now, is never late.

What do I dream of doing?
Write a book and give my impression on the state of affairs. Share my beliefs and add them to the pool of intellectual property of humanity. No matter how minimal the impact could be for now, but it can certainly influence someone and be the game changer. Being the game changer here is not the purpose by the way. The purpose is just to expand humanity's intellectual pool. If the entire world had the luxuries I have had, I can imagine the closest we can get to a Utopian society.

This morning I woke up to a cosy sunshine, made myself a cup of tea, read a few pages of newspaper, and here I am, scratching my head with ideas. This is the luxury I am talking about.

Do you expect the people of India below poverty line, who have hungry children to feed, who have had their crops failing again, who have to fight the ever-growing rates of inflation, to think at my level?
On a global scale the situation in some countries is dire. Iraq and Syria for example. These refugees haven't seen a beautiful morning, with birds singing, with kids playing etc, in a very long time. They have had to face the rat-ta-tats of Kalashnikovs, and booms of mortars every morning they wake up. Can they ever think of the luxury of sipping tea and discussing world politics?

The day the world manages to give everyone a proper meal, few clothes, a small home with state provided securities of liberty and fraternity, and some form of education to make them realize what they are worth, the world will start discussing what is the best for everyone on a global scale, over a cup of tea one fine morning (I don't think that basic 'luxury' for everyone is something that the world can't afford). We will see a boom in the world's intellectual pool.

Ideas will come out of every corner in the world and the internet will be the level platform for the relatively poorest to compete with mightiest megalomaniacs. The world will be on the same page.

I might feature this article in a book I write in the future. That would be a step taken towards my dream.

What is the purpose of having a dream too, even though life seems purposeless many a times?... To be continued on another Sunday morning.

A lot can happen over a cup of tea, indeed.
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